Today’s Read: Sleep Test

Sometimes, I’ll use my experiences as the resource. 🙂

I did an at-home sleep test a couple weeks ago, and I got my results last Friday. I have severe obstructive sleep apnea, which my sleep specialist also thinks is REM-specific sleep apnea (meaning it gets worse when I hit the REM stage of sleep). She also believes I have delayed sleep phase syndrome.

Combined, I struggle to fall asleep, and when I do fall asleep, my sleep is shitty. When I say I’m tired, I truly mean it. I never wake up feeling refreshed.

I’ve also commented to both my husband and my therapist that I think it’s a miracle I’m still alive. My oxygen saturation levels got down to 83%, called hypoxemia. Fun.

The thing is . . . the number of health issues I have that could be connected to this is obnoxious.

  • Pre-diabetic? I consume a lot of sugar just to stay away and have energy.
  • Weight: Connected to the lack of sleep and sugar consumption.
  • Fatigue: Duh.
  • Body aches: From fatigue.
  • Anxiety: Probably because my brain isn’t getting enough rest.
  • ADHD: Possibly because my brain isn’t getting enough oxygen.
  • GERD: Possibly because anxiety has me in constant fight or flight mode, which is because I don’t get enough rest.

That’s not even all of it. And to think . . . doctors always wanted to blame stuff on my weight.

To say I’m looking forward to a change in my sleep quality is an understatement. I’m getting an autopap in a week or so, and I’ll keep y’all updated on that process. I know it takes time to adjust to sleeping with any kind of apnea-assistance machine, but I’m happy to try it for as long as I need. After all . . . it’s not like my sleep could get much worse. (I should be careful what I say.)

Anyone else have this much shit with their sleep?!

Today’s Read: Your Money + Your Values

Values-based spending is a major part of my business and personal life, so I wanted to share this article.

I do wish the article went a little further. Where you spend your daily dollars and doing the research on the businesses from which you purchase is huge too! All the times I’ve called out places on my Instagram account for not supporting Black Lives Matter or allowing sexual predators to go unchecked? That’s values-based spending too.

Do you practice values-based personal finance? Is it something you want to do but aren’t sure how to start? Let’s talk about it in the comments below!

Today’s Read: Get That Cash

I’m not a fan of the gig economy, but I am a fan of making money where you can, so I figured I’d share this article.

The one I really like that’s listed here is Honey. This isn’t an ad at all, and I’m still figuring out how it works, but the four or five times I’ve gone to purchase something online with the Honey extension in my browser, it has kicked in, and I’ve saved at least $10. I don’t know about you, but $10 in four or five shopping trips is a lot to me.

So, yeah. Y’all out here making sure every dollar counts? You’ll want to check this out.

Today’s Read: Common Types of Privilege

It’s not just White privilege . . .

Do you benefit from any of these? Several of them? None of them? Were you surprised by any of these?

I know I benefit from socioeconomic and heterosexual privilege. The one that catches me off guard is socioeconomic. I don’t think of myself as someone who has more than others because my sense of wealth is so skewed by billionaires versus poverty. How about you?

And certainly, this isn’t all of them. We don’t hear about much beyond White privilege. But as societies are a series of ranked layers (stratification, in sociology), someone is at the top of each layer, and that someone is benefitting from the privilege of being at the top.

Was humanity destined to be this way? I think we were because these ranked layers appear in nature, but that doesn’t mean we have to bend to it so readily. We keep claiming we’re better than animals, but as we ARE animals, maybe we should recognize that reality first.

Today’s Resource: Sleep

Sleep is a great resource. We don’t appreciate it enough. Not getting enough sleep can literally kill you, but if it doesn’t get that bad, it can cause a host of other issues. Shall I be your evidence?

My dentist reminded me yesterday that I’m grinding my teeth (likely when I sleep), which messed up the placement of a crown on my tooth. After a few years of her trying to get me to do a sleep test, I actually had one scheduled that same day. I’ve never heard my dentist sound so pleased.

I did the sleep test last night. Hated it. Didn’t sleep well (oh, the data they’re going to get from me). I woke up around six something, took off the contraption, then went back to sleep. I didn’t wake up until 11 a.m., but I had a dermatology appointment at noon. However, I had to fill out a COVID screening, and I had to be honest that I was experiencing fatigue, and that required me to reschedule. (But I’m ALWAYS experiencing fatigue because I don’t sleep healthily.)

Not only did shitty sleep cause me to go to the dentist, but it also required me to reschedule a different appointment.

And that’s not even getting into my mad need for sugar and carbs because I never have enough energy to get through the day, and how that caused me to be pre-diabetic at my last doctor’s appointment.

Y’all. I’m pretty sure sleep is the meaning of life.

Today’s Resource: Doctors, Man

As I’ve mentioned before, I’m in the process of learning how I might have ADHD. No one has ever suggested I might have it until this year. A friend suggested it. Another friend mentioned it in an unrelated conversation. Then, when I mentioned it to my therapist, she made the familiar, “You knowwww . . .” comment that told me she’d been thinking about it.

This article, however, details one of a few reasons why it probably went unsuggested to me.

In addition to being a woman (ADHD is underdiagnosed for us as well), I’m a person of color. I’m also fat. Put all three of those together, and I’m only now starting to learn of my true medical concerns, and only because I’m asking about them and pushing my medical providers more than I ever have. Spoiler alert: Some doctors don’t like that.

Have you experienced this in your life? What went undiagnosed or unaddressed for you by the medical industry? What was falsely diagnosed for you? What do you have suspicions about? Do you feel treated differently by the medical industry because of some label you have? Talk to me in the comments!

Therapy Thoughts, Part One

I’m skipping the daily resource because my brain isn’t letting me focus well today. The ticking of ADHD checkboxes continues over here. My goal is to get tested before the end of the year.

But that’s not what I wanted to talk about. I want to try out a new feature where I talk about my experiences with therapy. I really want people to know what therapy is like, and while it’ll differ for everyone, I hope this helps if you’re considering therapy.

Yesterday, an old source of trauma found a new way to be awful. The good news is that it happened only a few hours before therapy, so from the moment it happened, I kept thinking, “Therapy cannot come soon enough.” I meet with my therapist every Monday afternoon, and I find that timing so helpful because it sets my week’s tone. Unfortunately, this week started with pain, and I know it will linger with me for a few days. It has potential to get worse, and I have no control over that. (I’m trying to be vague here. I don’t want to get into details.)

So, this week’s therapy appointment focused on two things: Fresh trauma and ADHD. My therapist gave me a place to vent my frustrations and hurt over the trauma, but she also gave me a place to think through the brain struggles I’ve been having.

See, I’m stuck. I have been for a few weeks. I’m so overwhelmed by my business and home and life that I make very little forward movement each day. I’m spinning in place, surrounded by tasks and unfinished projects, and I don’t know what to pull from where to get going. This, my therapist is convinced, is ADHD, and we talked about the possibility of getting tested and medicated. Because I’m currently angry with the pharmaceuticals industry, I’m not keen on being medicated for yet another condition, but I’m also digging a hole in this spot where I’m spinning.

This might not sound like a great ad for therapy, but without my therapist, I’d be even worse. I wouldn’t have the tools and the outside perspective to return to and consider to move me forward.

It’s worth it. That’s all I can think to say to wrap this up because my brain is being a weirdo.